Skip to main content

what i learned on our family camping trip

it has been quite the summer.

taking care of two male human beings with a combined age of four and a half is challenging enough on its own, but when you add summer trips to cape may, the poconos, central pennsylvania and pittsburgh, among others, you get an intense couple of months. it has been fun, for sure, but it has also been constantly moving - with only occasional tuesdays and wednesdays for the catching of breath.

our most recent adventure was a camping trip at knoebels amusement part in central pa this last weekend. we met shannon's mom and dad, brother and family, and sister and family for a weekend of camping and amusement. i learned several things during the weekend:

-the only thing hotter than waiting in line for the lamest boat ride ever created, besides hell (which may very well be the exact same thing), is lying in a tent at 1pm on the first day of august, listening to you 1 year old cry, hoping that he goes to sleep soon.

-seven children under the age of seven on one camping trip is, um, daunting.

-seriously, who thinks of this? "hey, lets make a track out of water and put ancient and mostly broken boats that can't go any faster than two and half miles per hour into it and charge people money to stand in hades-like heat in a line for it."

-wooden roller coasters are so much fun.

-central pennsylvania has the highest tattoo-to-human ratio of any geographic region in the world at 3.2 tpp (tats per person).

-fried potatoes, in all of their various forms, are the snack of champions. during the weekend i snacked on potato chips, steak fries, pierogies, boardwalk fries, hash browns, sweet potato fries, and potato cakes. of course, pretty much anything fried is the definition of perfection, and if you ever want to know a morsel of heaven on your tongue, drive to knoebels, head for the kiddie ride section, go straight for the totem treats stand and order the corn nuggets. for a mere $2 yoiu will experience the exact opposite of the wait in line for the boat ride. and when you've finished the last bit of golden-brown goodness, take my advice: order another batch. you won't be sorry. i promise.

-rolaids, not dogs, are man's best friend (unless of course, you are referring to corn dogs, which is a whole 'nother thing).

-there is a car (a truck, actually) in the united states that bears this bumper sticker: "my child just got his hunting license." i know this because i saw it. i promise.

-alligator meat tastes like chicken. i know this because i tasted it. i promise.

-one doesn't need luxury or even convenience to enjoy time with your family. you can wait in line and sweat your skin off and pee into poison ivy and chase kids through puddles and still have a good time because you see your one year old laughing his head off on the firetruck ride, or you share a bite of cotton candy with your happy-as-can-be three year old and you share a knowing glance with your wife that says, with only your eyes, "we are so lucky." yes, wherever you are and whatever you are doing, you can be content to be with your family. of course, a couple of corn nuggets can sure help, too.

Comments

Crafty P said…
God bless you! a camping trip with children.

maybe one day for us.... in the meantime, we'll enjoy little mini-vacays to kennywood and idlewild!

thanks for my morning chuckle and thanks for reading.

hey, you can say a lot about recipes... you LOVE food don't you? how do you think food makes it to your plate? via a recipe! geesh.
Anonymous said…
Ah, Pennsylvania.

Pittsburgh at one end, Philadelphia at the other, and Alabama in the middle.

But, as you've seen, it can be fun.
Anonymous said…
Awesome--you've proven, once again, a theory I've had for years now, which is that what many pastors really wish they'd been is standup comedians. What a great post.

Hope things are well for you, sir. They are as well as can be here.

Popular posts from this blog

bad haircuts (for a laugh)

everybody needs to laugh.  one good way i have found to make that happen is to do a simple google image search for 'bad haircut.'  when you do so, some of the following gems show up.  thankfully, my 9th grade school picture does NOT show up.  otherwise, it would certianly make this list!  please laugh freely and without inhibition.  thank you and have a nice day. 

happiness is dry underwear

we started potty training jack on thursday. we followed a program called POTTY TRAIN IN ONE DAY, which, by the way, i think is kind of crazy. i mean, if someone were to offer you a book called, "ACHIEVE WORLD PEACE IN ONE DAY" i don't think you would take it seriously. and yet here we are, trying to accomplish an equally daunting task in one 24-hour period. it is intense. the day is shrouded in a lie because as soon as your happily diapered child wakes up you tell him that it is a big party. we had balloons and streamers and noisemakers and silly string - all the trappings of a legitimate party. but it is most certainly not a party. it is a hellishly exhausting day. as soon as jack got out of bed, we gave him a present: an anatomically correct doll that wets himself. jack named him quincy. several times quincy successfully peed in the potty and even had an accident or two in his "big boy underwear." he also dropped a deuce that looked and smelled sus...

i'm giving away the swamp

so this is a collage called swamp. i made it in february of last year. it is currently framed in a homemade, hand-painted frame. it is paper collage on a book binding panel. it is 7" x 10". and i am giving it away. i've been wanting to have a blog giveaway for some time, and the time has finally arrived. here's how it works. all you need to do is leave a comment on this post. by leaving a comment you are automatically entered into the contest (as long as your comment offers a way for me to get in touch with you, or you know that i know you). the contest will be open until next wednesday at noon, eastern standard time. at that time the contest will officially be closed and i will pick a random number. the person whose comment matches that number wins! for example, if i happen to pick the number 33, the thirty-third comment will win. oh, and one more rule: you can only post ONCE. if you win, i will send you the collage, signed by me, the artist, free of c...